Me and Eleanor

Once upon a time, I was in grade 4. I lived in Toronto with my mother in the Kew Beach area in a four-plex, top left hand side. I only lived at that place for one year, but it was a crazy year. It was also the year of my very first male teacher named Mr. Von Zuben and when I met Eleanor.

Eleanor was a good little girl, as was I. However, when the two of us got together, we were bad news. I do not know how we came up with the ideas that we had and acted out, I only knew that we fit together like two peas in a pod. We often were late back to class from lunch because although we lived very close to school, we found way more interesting things to do along the way back. There were leaves to jump in, hills to roll down, not to mention that The Flintstones were on at lunch time too. I really don’t remember any consequences for missing so much school but I would assume that my mother was called so there must have been some good ones. My mom was not one to let things go unpunished.  Of course there were things that were never found out too. Eleanor and I would go after school to the kindergarten gym where all the huge wooden blocks and tricycles were and we would play for what seemed like hours. We would then realize that our mothers would be wondering where we were. I had to call my mom at her work to let her know when I was home. If I was late, I usually said that I forgot to call but that I had been home all this time. Her next question would need some real quick thinking. “I called but you didn’t answer. Why is that?” I would love to go back in time to listen to my ridiculous lies. I would also have loved call display back then! One day Eleanor and I had a stupendous idea to take tricycles home to get there faster. Now we were felons, but just for the first time. I can’t remember where we hid those bikes but we did use them often enough, until the snow. One time in that gym we were making enough noise to cause the janitor to come and investigate. We ducked down behind a wall of the huge wooden blocks and tried our best not to giggle till he had left.

Eleanor and I both had a sweet tooth but rarely any money, so what were we to do? We learned the fine art of shoplifting. Felons, yet again. The candy bar racks were low and we would often talk with the store owner about all sorts of things because, well, we were nice and polite thieves. I remember one incident where I was talking about the weather with the store-keep while Eleanor had her back up to the rack of goods, still facing the gentleman when she made the mistake of making too much noise. He asked her what she was doing and I’ll never forget her reply; “Oh, just crinkling the candy…” I think we went hungry that day!

We did not stay hungry for long though. I did a most terrible thing that I don’t think I even really regret, except that it was so wrong.  Mr. Von Zuben foolishly left his wallet on his desk in the classroom. Yep, I stole it and even pretended to help him look for it. After school Eleanor and I emptied the contents of his wallet, finding $17, which we split, and dropped the wallet in the school’s yard along the fence. We had no interest in the drivers’ license or cards so we left those in the wallet. So the next day when his wallet was returned to him, miraculously, we all clapped, and really, he was only out $17 bucks. Perhaps I would have done time for that one? Not a proud moment, that’s for sure. But we did actually purchase candy for some time which removed some suspicion off of us.

There was a rumour going about the class that someone had started her period. I was 8 at the time and didn’t have a clue what that meant. Eleanor had already turned 9 because her birthday was in September and apparently being two months older than me made her more knowledgeable in such matters. When I asked her about this period thing she was with a few other friends who were also 9. She said to me, “Well Leigh-Ann, when you are a bit older, I’ll tell you. You’re too young now.”  I was crushed. I think that this was the only time I was angry with her though. She would not even tell me on the way home when it was just the two of us except to say that it was something a girl gets at a certain age. What happened later I will not easily forget. I was feeling so left out and so perturbed I asked my mother. I’m sure she was not expecting that question to pop up just yet and completely out of the blue, but for what she did, I love her. She had just come home from work when I blurted out my hurt feelings and questions concerning a period. She told me she needed to get changed and we would talk soon. Ah, hope! When she came back to the living room, she had a bottle of wine with her and a large notepad. She poured herself a glass of wine, sat down with me and proceeded to fill me in on all I would ever need to know about sex and the reproductive system, complete with hand drawn diagrams.  I was absolutely positive that Eleanor did NOT know any of this!  I went to bed feeling special and satisfied that night. My mom, I think, went to bed feeling a bit woozy.